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Submitted on
April 27, 2014


6 (who?)
A young fourth grade girl, by the name of Rosalyn Delmar, ran down the corridors of South Park Elementary, dodging the other kids as she went. In her arms she held a huge grey notebook, some pages were sticking out, as if she’d ripped them out. She ran at top speed, obviously in a hurry.

She had to find him.

She stopped at the T-shaped section of the corridor, looking both ways to try and decide which way to go. She continues to run forward, but decides to go back the other way. Whilst turning, she runs into Tweek, a good friend of hers.
This, however, was not a good thing to do. Tweek was holding his usual Starbuck’s coffee, and it spilled all down his teal shirt. He’d also buttoned it up incorrectly, meaning that the coffee burnt some of his tummy.

Ross scratches the back of her neck, “Gosh, I’m sorry Tweek! I didn’t see you there!”
Tweek twitches uncomfortably, trying to button up his shirt in the right way but failing as per usual. “Why are you running around like that man?! YOU SCARED ME!”
She looked at him guiltily, “I’m trying to find Craig! Have you seen him?”
“I--ugh—maybe he’s at his l-locker?”
“...where’s that again?”
“Across from the Sixth Grade classroom I think...”
“Okay! Thank you!”
She dashes off once again, leaving Tweek on his own.

Once she got to the section in which Craig’s locker was located, she stopped at the corner, and peered round, hoping to sneak up on him without him seeing her.

Ross and Craig had been friends for a good long time. Even though Craig could be a huge asshole to her, and rarely showed emotion, Ross seemed to like him a lot. What she liked about him, she didn’t really know. Nobody really knew why they even hung around with each other. They seemed completely different personality wise. But Ross knew that they secretly had a lot in common. She didn’t know if he was aware of it, but she hoped so.

What they did share though, was their habit of causing trouble.

Craig practically lived in detention; he couldn’t avoid it even if he tried. Which he didn’t. He was never afraid to be rude to others, even teachers. Often swearing or, his main habit, flipping them off whenever they bothered him. He was generally a fearless kid, and a lot of people respected him for it.
Ross was also a trouble-maker, but she was more into pranks. She tended to annoy others, not always with intentions to do so, but she was still amused by it either way. She was skilled in lock-picking and other vandal-like activities. But most people didn’t suspect this; they just saw Ross as innocent and energetic.

Whilst peeking round the corner, Ross spotted her best friend transferring items from his locker to his yellow backpack. Normal students would transfer stuff like books and studying utensils. Not Craig Tucker. The items he were stuffing into his bag ranged from a soccer ball, to a PSP, to even his guinea pig Stripe which had been lurking in his locker for the entire day.

The chocolate haired youngster watched as a small group of girls walked behind her best friend, giggling among themselves. One of them tapped Craig on the back and waved, to which he just looked back with no expression whatsoever. When further down the corridor, the girl shouted something to him in a flirtatious tone. Ross couldn’t tell exactly what she said as she wasn’t really paying attention to the girls. Craig just flipped her off without turning his head.

Ross was completely aware of Craig’s habit to attract girls. He was a decent looking boy; the girls voted him the cutest in their grade. But he doesn’t mean to attract them, not at all. In fact, he has no pride in attracting them. He’s far from a gentleman, and would never want to be. He’s just Craig, the guy who doesn’t give a fuck about anything.

Ross waited a few seconds before approaching her friend, wearing a huge grin on her face.
“Hiya Craigster!”
Craig turns around to face her, “...hey.”
“Whatcha doin’?”
“Getting ready for soccer practice.”
“Cool! Uh...hey, I wanted to show you something I did in art class today!” She opens the notebook she’d been holding. She confidently presents a drawing of them both. She was almost certain that her art would impress him.


“...why do I look like a monkey?” He points at himself. Ross wasn’t much of an artist, like most fourth graders, but she put quite a bit of effort into it, and was therefore offended.

“Craig, I tried my best okay? Let’s see you try and do better.”
“Nah. I hate drawing.”
“What don’t you hate?” She chuckles.
“Not a lot.” He smirks a little. On very few occasions would Craig smirk in public, as he’s trying to keep his “bad-ass mode” on, as Ross likes to call it.

He points at the drawing of her, “At least you look decent. You just had to make me look like a douchebag.”
“That’s because you are one.” She teases, folding her arms and sitting on her hip.
He flips her off, picking up his bag from the floor.

Ross notices a sign of movement in one of the side pockets of his back-pack.
“Craig...not again.”
“You brought Stripe again, didn’t you?”
He extracts the guinea pig from his pocket, keeping it close to him as to not let anybody see. “He gets lonely back at home.”

Ross sighs, “I’m sure he’d have more company at home than stuffed into your locker!”
“Mom forgets to feed him. At least I can feed him in between classes.”
“You bring guinea pig food to school...seriously?
“Then what does he eat?”

Craig takes an open packet of potato chips out of his locker and shuts it. Ross looks at it and raises an eyebrow. “You’re going to kill that hamster someday--“
“Guinea Pig. He’s a Guinea Pig Ross.”
“Alright alright, don’t bite me!”

“Anyway...” Craig hitches up his backpack, “Like I said, I’ve got soccer practice. So...see ya I guess—“ he turns around to leave.
“Wait!” Ross grabs his arm, “...what are you doing after practice?”
He shrugs, “I don’t know.”
“You wanna hang out? I have nothing to do!”

She waves as he disappears down the corridor. He’s actually in a pretty decent mood today! she thought.


After school, Craig practiced soccer with his team on the playground. Nearby, Ross silently waited for him. She started to get bored waiting, so she extracted a book from her bag. Ross wasn’t usually the type to read, but her grandfather made sure that she carried around a book about flowers at all times. As her family ran a flower shop in the town called the “Delmar Cosmos”, Ross was to know every single name of every single flower that they owned. And there sure was a lot of them.

She started to read the book, when she felt a hand on her shoulder. She turned around to see none other than Clyde Donovan, Craig’s “best bro”. Well, that’s what he refers himself as. Ross always believed that she was Craig’s best friend. But she also knew the kind of relationship he had with Clyde, and that they’d known each other for a lot longer than she had know Craig. She still hung out with the both of them, regardless.

“’sup Delmar? Whatcha doing?” He greets. Token Black was also with him.
Ross smiles, “Oh, heya Clyde! I’m just waiting for Craig to finish soccer!”
“I thought as much...hey, when are you two gonna go out?”
“Yeah, you guys are way too close to just be friends!” Token joins in.
Ross frowns, “It’s not like that, how many times do I have to say it to you nincompoops?”
“Alright calm down...we know that Craig means a lot to you and everything but... we just wanna know when we’re gonna be the awkward third wheels to your relationship.”
“You’re not going to be third wheels, because there is no relationship!”

This isn’t the only time Ross has been accused of fancying Craig. In fact, she gets it all the time. And so does Craig. They both greatly deny it though, because that isn’t exactly the case. They don’t fancy each other, and they see each other as friends, and nothing more. But certain people, especially Clyde Donovan, enjoy constantly teasing them none-the-less.

Ross has been a prominent part of Craig’s group of friends since not long after she joined the school. After meeting Craig, she was introduced to Clyde, then Token, then Tweek, then Jimmy. She seems to be okay with the other members of the group, besides Token, who she is strangely intimidated by.

The two boys sat down either side of her, looking over at Craig playing soccer.

Token pipes up, “Hey, do you think Craig only joined the soccer team to get closer to the cheerleaders?” He chuckles a little.
Clyde smirks, “Maybe. And that’s probably just to make Ross here jealous...” he wiggles his eyebrows at her.

He yelps after receiving a slap from the enraged girl sat beside him. “He joined because he loves soccer, alright?!” she shouts, luckily not catching the soccer teams attention.
Clyde laughs, “Whatever, Mrs Lover-Lover. We all know the truth!”

She rolls her eyes and groans. Clyde annoys her to a certain extent, and she doesn’t really know why she puts up with him. He never fails to irritate her; his whining irritates her, his teasing irritates her, his cockiness irritates her. He sometimes even flirts with her, purely just to irritate her. But Clyde is still considered one of her good friends because, besides his obnoxiousness, he’s a genuinely kind hearted boy towards her.

After a further half hour of Clyde being an idiot, and Token talking about his exceptionally high grades, Ross finally saw Craig picking up his bag and walking towards the group.

“Craig Motherfucking Tucker.” Says Clyde, greeting him with a slap on the back, “How’s my bro?”

Craig blankly responds, “...Fine.”
“Hey, what are you doing now? Wanna come back to my house? Clyde thought of something really cool we could do!”
Clyde looks smug, “Yeah. I saw Red writing her Facebook password in the computer lab today. We can totally hack her Facebook dude!”
“Yeah, and afterwards, I can show you this awesome new video game I got!"

Ross glares at the boys. The only problem with being best friends with a boy is that he and his friends would often leave her out and do “boyish” things together. It’s not like they'd forget that she’s there, either; they'd know she’s there. And she hates that.

Craig shakes his head at the offer, “Nah. I need to get home.”
The boys look at each other, baffled. “But...why?” says Token.
“I need to go home. I’m, err, grounded...”

Ross immediately knew something was up. Usually being grounded doesn’t bother him; he’ll escape somehow. This was definitely something he wouldn’t say, and she seemed to be the only one that noticed it.
Clyde just shrugged, “Whatever dude. You’re missing out.” And the two made their exit, having conversations about hot girls as they went.

Ross turns to Craig, “So can we still hang out or...?”
“Sorry Ross. I have to head home.”
He then walks away, leaving Ross stood on her own, confused.

There must be something more to this, she thought, Because I don’t believe him one bit.

She decided that she was going to follow him. She has a minor criminal reputation, and thus knew how to be sneaky and slip by people unnoticed. She took to the shadows as the sun went down, followed the raven haired boy as he walked to his destination.

Surprisingly, Craig actually did walk home. But Ross noticed that his parent’s car was missing, and he had to let himself inside his house with a key. Once he was inside, Ross ran up to the front of the house and hid behind a bush below his window.
She peeked inside and watched as Craig turned on his television. She ducked when she saw him turn around to where she was. She panicked a little. Should I knock? She thought, What if he catches me? I’m only curious as to what he’s up to...

After a minute or so of daydreaming into the distance, she hears noises coming from inside the house. The television volume had been turned up extremely high.
She took a glance through the window once again. A DVD was playing on the TV, which film it was, Ross could not recall. She scanned the rest of the room.

And there was Craig, dressed in a spacesuit and a huge circular plastic helmet. He jumped on to his couch, holding a pretend ray gun, and making juvenile sound effects. He was reciting the film’s script as it played, acting as the main protagonist.

Ross couldn’t contain herself. She giggled at the sight of Craig being happy. It wasn’t just unusual too, but it also creeped her out a little just to see a smile on his face for once.

She decided to make herself noticed. She jumped up infront of the window, and frantically waved at Craig. He fell onto his ass, obviously startled, which made her laugh even more.

He gets up and opens his front door, looking pissed off. “Ross!”
She blushes nervously, “Oh... heya Craigster! I was just umm...wondering what you were doing?”
“...why did you follow me home?”
“You refused to hang out with Token and Clyde. I knew something was up.”

He frowns, “So now you know my secret, huh? Yes I like to play space in my free time... Are you happy?”
“Actually...” she walks further towards Craig, “...I was wondering if I could join in...”

Craig’s eyes widen, “...what?”
“I could, along with you! Like, I could be your alien rival!”

He sighs, “You’re just saying that. You wouldn’t wanna play space with me.”
“Psssh!” She decries, “You’re my best friend! Why would I not want to?”
“One. It’s childish. And two...” Craig hesitates, but then smirks, “...I’d beat your ass at it every time anyway.”
Ross smiles, “No you wouldn’t! And now I’m even more curious to play it so I can show you otherwise!”

Craig sighs, giving in. It’s often that he gives in to her, because she will be persistent in order to get her way.
“Alright. Come inside. I think I’ve got some sort of alien costume.”

They walk up to his bedroom and he roots through his wardrobe, finding a pair of alien antennas. He hands them to her, “Here. Now you can be the alien.”
“Awesome!” She jumps into a fighting stance. Or at least, a good attempt at one. “I’m in your space turf, fight me if you dare!”

He takes out his ray gun from his back pocket, pointing it at her. “Very well, I accept your challenge, you disgusting creature!”

I can't even describe how much :'D

I felt like I owed Ana for her absolutely amazing drawings of Ross and Craig she drew for here! I hope you like it! :D

Starring: :iconaskrosalyndelmar: 
Ross does not belong to me, she belongs to her wonderful owner. C: :iconana-beth:

Craig, Tweek, Clyde and Token belong to Trey Parker and Matt Stone 
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Ana-beth Featured By Owner Jul 2, 2014  Student Digital Artist
just letting you know, I reread this over and over whenever i'm feeling sad cause it makes me happy.
raidpirate52 Featured By Owner May 5, 2014
I liked it. :) 

I find it hilarious Craig keeps his playfulness and happiness a secret at home and pretends to not care at school. Pretty relatable really. :) 

Keep up the awesome stories! :D

Clyde pretends to flirt with her! :lol: 
omfgimkatie Featured By Owner May 6, 2014
Thank you so much!

And yeah me too! Craig secretly loves space, it's a known fact ;3 it's what makes him soooo happy

I love Clyde and Ross' friendship too Cx and how he winds her up on purpose!
raidpirate52 Featured By Owner May 6, 2014
Yeah, it's what I got my rp ideas for last night. :lol: 
Ana-beth Featured By Owner Apr 27, 2014  Student Digital Artist

Words can't describe how amazing this is?!?!?!?!? I'm like spazzing my ass off as I read this over and over ahjdcfnhjksdfghjkdfngh

Your writing is so amazing ahdfjkef and YOU GOT ROSS'S PERSONALITY SO WELL I ?????
I would give criticism on her personality but it's so spot on there's nothing to say???
I think the only thing you got was that when it says her grand-daddy makes her memorize the flowers from the book, cause when she says "my old-man" she means her dad xD but...that's basically it honestly...

omfgimkatie Featured By Owner Apr 27, 2014



Oh...and I apologize for that minor mistake! I will change it if I can!



I kid.
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